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Fake Arm 101
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I was born with a limb deficiency. I've worn various types of prosthetic arms my entire life. This is what I wear now:
My arm is almost always decorated with stickers. In this picture, it is sporting a sticker that came on the new slipcover I bought. I thought it was funny.....
Frequently Asked Questions
What happened to your arm?
I was born without a right forearm. It's a congenital birth defect most probably caused by a loose blood vessel that wrapped around my arm before the bones had developed, cutting it off. I have worn a prosthetic arm, Captain Hook style, since I was two.
What's that on your arm?
When people ask this, I am never sure to what they are referring. They could be asking about my fake arm or they could be asking about the stickers I generally have stuck to it. By default, I assume they mean the arm itself. To little kids, usually the askers of this question, I explain that it is my arm. I had been born without an arm, and the doctors gave me this "arm" to help me do all the things they can do. Then I demonstrate opening and closing the hook for them.
How does it work?
My body-powered prosthesis attaches by a strap across my back to anchor on my opposite shoulder. When I move my elbow the hook opens.
Why don't you have one of those really cool arms like I saw on the Discovery Channel?
Admittedly, my fake arm is pretty low tech. And there is some really cool technology out there. But Discovery Channel technology is slow to actually get to regular people. Prosthetics are really quite expensive. Most insurance companies consider them cosmetic and do not cover them.
How do you afford them if they're so expensive?
My parents were pretty poor when I was young, so I was eligible for free arm stuff until I turned 21 through a charity. I got long lectures on the expense involved in prosthetics and the importance of a good insurance plan on my last free visit.
Does it hurt?
Kids always seem to be concerned that my arm hurts, and they never seem to be quite convinced that it doesn't despite all of my assurances that it does not hurt and that it feels just like their arms.
Do you ever have phantom pains?
Nope. Since I was born without an arm my mind is not aware of a deficiency.
Can you feel it if I touch your fake arm?
Mostly yes. Even if I am not looking I can feel everything but a very faint touch on my fake arm. Remember my real half arm is inside the socket. It is still very close to my body, and I am aware of it. That said, I am not always as aware of it as I should be. If I bump into you arm first out of clumsiness, I'm sorry in advance!
Were you a thalidomide baby?
No, that was before my time and largely in
Did your mom do drugs or something?
No, she did not. It was totally random that I was born this way. Thousands of kids are born with various birth defects every day for no real reason. This is the only question about my arm that I find rude.
How do you put your hair in a pony tail?
I can figure out a way to do anything. It might require a bit of ingenuity to adapt the situation to my needs, but I have yet to not be able to do something that I need to do. And when people ask about a particular task, I really have to think about how I do it because it becomes second nature to do it the way that I've found for myself.
Is your prosthesis surgically attached to you?
No way! That would be awful. I can take it off whenever I want. Like when I am sleeping or bathing for example.
Do you ever go without your fake arm?
Yes. I got without a lot in the summer when it's hot because it's more comfortable that way. Or when I got to a concert where I might want to dance. I often take it off in the evenings because after wearing it all day my little arm can get a little sore.
Are you completely useless without your fake arm?
No. There are things that I have to concede that I can't do (or that would take a ridiculous amount of effort to do) when I am not wearing my arm, but not as many as you'd think.
Do you want me to help you when you look like you need it?
You can ask. I'm the independent sort who likes to do things on my own mostly, but, as long as you don't mind if I say no, you can always ask.
Can you type?
Yes. I type with my five fingers about as well as an average two handed typist. Secret confession: I'm actually really proud of my typing ability. People never expect me to be able to type.
Were you teased a lot as a kid?
Not really. I don't know how exactly I got out of being teased, but I pretty much did.
Why do you call it a "fake arm"?
Well, one of the interesting things about prosthetics culture is that everyone has a distinct idiolect. In the company of doctors and prosthetists, we talk about "residual limbs" and "terminal devices." but among ourselves and our families, we all use language and terminology that we have developed and are comfortable with.
What kind of terminology should I use?
Whatever you feel comfortable with. As long as it isn't mean-spirited, I'm happy.
Do you sleep in your arm?
No. I take it off to sleep. Actually I take it off whenever I am relaxing, just to be more comfortable.
Do you get discounts on gloves since you only need to buy one?
I must admit, I've never tried.
Do you get disability benefits from the government?
No. I've been told that I probably could, but I've never looked into it. However, I was also told that I would be able to get my entire college education paid for as a student with a disability, which turned out to be false.
Are you left handed?
I use my left hand to write, but I have been told that I am quite obviously a "right hander" by doctors and prosthetists. Apparently, if I was not naturally inclined to use my right hand, I would not be nearly as proficient with my fake arm as I am.
Are you sure the term is really "prosthetist"? That doesn't seem right.
Yes, I am. But I usually use "prosthetic guys" or "arm guys" to refer to them.
Do you ever wish you had another hand?
Honestly, no. The idea of gaining another hand seems extraneous. Unnecessary. Just like a third hand would feel to you. I know it's hard to understand.
But don't you wish you were like everyone else?
Not really. Maybe occasionally, but it's more for other people's sake than my own. It's hard for me to explain in a way that makes sense. Maybe it is because I grew up among basically accepting people, but I very rarely feel a lack.
Does it embarrass you to talk about your arm?
It can. But I would rather people just ask, so that I can give them a real answer rather than let them jump to their own conclusions. I am a rather quiet person, and I don't always like to have attention drawn to me. So I generally appreciate it when people ask their questions discreetly or in a one-on-one setting, where I would not be embarrassed at all.
If there is a question that I've forgotten to address here, if there is something you are still confused about or wondering, ask me. Fakearm101@gmail.com
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© MR 2006